A stain on my dress

No, not that kind, you dirty minded little freaks. You know what they say about assumptions, too, so mind you – keep your heads out of the gutter.

I got to work this morning and was standing at the printer when I looked down and happened to notice this dark brown stain staring at me from the bottom of my white dress. (Side note: I think it was chocolate.)

“HELLO!” It screamed at me, “Guess what!? I’m going to be a stubborn little bitch and not come out – sucker!”

Yeah – well, it was. I tried a Tide Stick and with no luck! I tried water and soap, and low and behold, there it sat waiving its nasty little paws at me. So I decided that since it was only 8:45am I should go ahead and just change. On my way down to my car I started thinking about everything that is going on with me lately and arrived at this thought: there are going to be stains on my life, your life – everyone’s life – that you are not going to be able to get out. They are going to sit there, mocking you, reminding you of the things that you don’t what to be reminded of. They are going to be a constant, nagging blemish on your life that will remind you of the best friend you lost because of some frivolous argument; they are going to remind you of the lover you lost because you were afraid to give them your heart; they are going to remind you of the bad financial decision you made, or the night you drank your weight in whiskey and made sweet, passionate love to the toilet seat until 2pm the next day.

But that’s not to say that stains aren’t going to remind you of the best friend you made when you accidentally bumped into them at a bar; or the adventure you had one weekend when you opened your heart to someone; or the great time you had with a group of friends one night, or the great conversation you had with someone unexpected. They are going to remind you of the friendships that came out of letting go and giving into the fact that you need someone told be there for you. Stains aren’t always bad and they aren’t always good, but they are always going to be a reminder to you of the things that you had in your life.

Stains aren’t always permanent; they can be washed out or patched over, but they will always be there, they just may not be as visible anymore. You may completely toss the article of clothing, but a few months later you may think to yourself, “I wish I had kept that shirt and tried to work out that stain” or you may forget about it completely. The one thing you should never forget is that each stain becomes a part of you and makes you who you are.

I just happen to be chocolate today.

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