I sit at home today for the first Monday to embark my journey forward with the life of a student. I’m sipping on my coffee, in my monster coffee cup that I bought for my first desk job with my friend Dante, with a pencil in my hand that appears to have made its way home with me from my current – to just recently quit – job and the corner of my table has my pencil cup holder and my post-its — all from work.
I’m surrounded by work. It’s almost like a constant reminder of look what decision you just made, Samantha.
I still think that I’ve made the best decision possible. That, of all the things in my life right now, it’s more and more important for me to finish my education and to move in a more progressive way forward with my life. This is my life in chapters, and this is the newest chapter.
Yesterday, on the way home from a tournament in Athens with my boyfriend I almost had a panic attack because I had an overwhelming sensation of fear flood over me with the quickly looming deadlines for school assignments. It was then that I realized that I have all the time I need to accomplish these things. It was an odd sensation. A bit of jealously consumed me when I realized that all of the people who have been able to take advantage of this no-school-all-work shenanigans, well, dammit – envy.
So this is the newest chapter of my life – Chapter 26 reads “A year of struggle for years of fortune” (I flippin’ hope).
And also, now that I have time, I’ll be able to write more. Thankfully.